Day 83

I am officially one week or six workouts away from completing my p90x journey!!

Not gonna lie, I wasn't really feeling kenpo tonight *insert shocked gasps*! First time pretty much ever? Yeah, I think so. I was having a productive day- work, cleaning, paying bills, etc.- so it's not like I was in lazy mode (although, admittedly, I wanted to be). I think the problem was that I am SO SORE. Seriously. My upper back/shoulder area hurts so much!! It's all like one giant, painfully swollen and overworked knot. Yeah, it's that bad. Throwing punches and blocks hurt like... I don't even know what! A lot. It was a dull, achey, if-you-continue-to-use-me-I-will-make-you-miserable kind of muscle pain. I wanted so badly to bring it and be all sorts of intense, acting like I'm some sort of boxing master ;] However, my muscles refused to comply with my sincere request. Rebels. All I wanted to do was work hard, again. Don't get me wrong, though, I did still work hard! As hard as I could, in fact. That just happened to be less hard than I would have preferred. I honestly did not have the strength in my upper body to beast kenpo tonight. Heck, my lower body was screaming, too! Legs & back has been tearing up my hamstrings and buttocks like no other. I'm not sure what it is, but that workout has been kicking my butt, quite literally. From the moment I woke up this morning I was painfully aware that I worked my legs especially hard yesterday. Before I even got out of bed, I could feel like leg muscles screaming at me in defiance of all the hard work I made them do yesterday. Sorry guys but killer legs only come from killer leg workouts! I think they're beginning to forgive me ;] Nonetheless, I got through kenpo tonight and I'm happy that I did! I felt great... once it as over, haha. I wanted to give up halfway through but my irrational need to do everything 100% even if it nearly kills me prevented me from giving up. I'm thankful for my responsible discipline. If that's what I should call it, haha. Craziness? That might be more accurate somedays. Although, I am happy to say, I never worked out to the point of throwing up! I've done that before, no fun. But hey, at least I'm dedicated, right? Right?! I brought it super hard this whole time (okay, okay, some times harder than others *cough*yoga*cough) but I don't think I took it to the point of being unhealthy for my poor little body.

Wow, I am in ramble mode tonight. I think it has something to do with the three-day weekend ahead. I'm super ready for a rest day tomorrow! Jacob claims that I have p90x senioritis, hahaha. I'm so ready to finish this round, recoup for a week then start over or start another intense program. My body needs a down day. Though I hope it doesn't effect my weight loss... I know it doesn't sound like a very big deal, but I'm super excited that I've lost 1.5lbs over the past two weeks! Yeah yeah, that sounds like such lame/slow weight loss, but it doesn't come off overnight!! Especially since I'm losing it the healthy way and, though I hate to admit it, I don't have *much* fat to lose. I would absolutely loooove to lose about 5% but I'm not sure that's possible for my body. I'm aiming to be as healthy and fit as possible. And quite honestly, I'm quite content at where the scale is sitting for me! It feels so good to say that. I'm happy with 123.5lbs! I'd love to get back down to 115, but I'd muuuuch rather have those extra few pounds of muscle. I wasn't healthy when I weighed 115. And, I wasn't strong. I'm SO much stronger now than I was then or even 83 days ago! I'm proud of how far I've come, despite the fact that I would still like to go so much further. I'm making progress. I feel good, I feel healthy. I love my sculpted shoulders/delts/back. I love my toned upper abs (and I'm working VERY hard to make my lower abs just as good!). I'm learning to be proud of my body- what it can do, how it functions, how strong it has become. This is one of the very best feelings there is!! If you're reading this right now and you're contemplating embarking on a fitness journey of your own, I would just like to encourage you to do it!! Test your body, push it to the limit and then force those limits to move. Your body is capable of so much more than you give it credit for!! Work your hardest and appreciate every thing your body can do! Our bodies are so incredible... they grow, adapt and transform on a daily basis. The question is, are they doing so for the better or for worse? Make your body the best it can be!

Okay, I'm done rambling now. I'm just so happy right now, I couldn't contain myself, ha. Tomorrow is rest day then on to a recovery week. I'm going to do my best, forget the rest and finish strong!